God created mankind for a love relationship, a relationship between God and humanity, and a love relationship between male and female. After God created Adam, He saw that there was no one to whom Adam could relate to and love can’t love alone. Love can't exist and be expressed alone, hence, He created the female.
Everything God created, He blessed and said “it was good.”
The bible also says that all good and perfect gifts come from above and they add no sorrow. So when God created Adam and Eve to be in relation, it was a blessing.
Then in Genesis 1:28, the bible says that God blessed them both, male and female.
A relationship between two people is only going to be as healthy as the two people in it. The relationship will only be as good as whatever those two people bring to it.
In other words, the relationship will be what you make it.
Society has portrayed to be bad but marriage is not bad, it's the people that make it bad. The Bible teaches that marriage itself is honorable. It never said that about the people involved because that statement refers to the marriage institution.
Marriage is always to be highly esteemed as a perfect institution established by God.
God instituted marriage perfectly and the Bible teaches us that marriage—the institution, is honorable. It never said anything about the people involved. It's nothing wrong with God's perfect institution, it's the people. It's the same with a dating relationship.
God's design for how men and women are to relate to each other functions perfectly, it's the malfunctioning people that mess it up.
People bring their own ideas and ways into the institution and then wonder why they don’t get the results that God—the manufacturer has promised. To get the success of any product, you gotta go to the manufacturer and follow their instructions. If you don’t follow the manufacturer’s manual, it’s not the product that’s at fault, it’s you.
Divorce is really not the problem, that’s the fruit. The root is defective dating that leads to a defective marriage due to defective individuals who did not follow God’s design for love, dating and marriage.
If a person is toxic, they will bring that toxicity into the relationship. If a person is broken, they will bring their brokenness into the relationship. If a person is rejected, they will bring that rejection into the relationship. If a person is prideful and manipulative, they will bring that into the relationship.
I love to cook but I’m not much of a baker. I like cooking because you can be creative. You can mix different seasonings and so on. But baking, if you mix up one ingredient or miss an ingredient, you are screwed. Think about baking a cake. “What happens if you put in too much baking powder? The cake will swell up and explode. What if you forget to add baking powder? The cake will collapse. The end result either way is a tore up cake.
And so is it the cake’s fault or your fault? There was nothing wrong with the kitchen, there was nothing wrong with the tools and accessories, and there was nothing wrong with the pan. The problem was with some of the ingredients. A cake will only be as good as it’s ingredients.
So it is in a relationship.
A lady I worked with reached out to me and asked me my thoughts on a particular dating situation she was dealing with. She was really bothered by it. She said she didn't have much experience with dating and wanted my thoughts.
Well the guy she was dating got mad because she was going on a women’s only business trip. He got mad because she didn’t invite him. She shared that he was making manipulative remarks to her about it and had given her an ultimatum that if he couldn’t go then she couldn’t go.
Before she could continue on I stopped her and said, “oh nah girl he is bringing you problems.” I said to her, “me personally, if a person is bringing me problems, we can’t do business.” I said, “because I need my mental space for what I’m doing and for where I’m going.”
She started laughing at me and said, “Gwen you funny.” But she got it. Now let me say this, I don’t tell anyone to leave their relationship. If I’m asked, I will share my thoughts. I will share what I will do, that’s it and that’s all. I mean unless the person is being abused or something, and in that case, nobody should have to tell you to go, you should tell yourself.
So I said to her, “you don’t want to date somebody who is bringing you problems.” I said, “if you marry him those same problems are gonna amplify.”
I also told her, I said, “you wanna date somebody who help solve problems, not be a problem. There’s enough problems with life, you don’t need somebody to come and add to it.”
So from that day forth when I would see her and I would ask her how she was doing she would say, “I’m good, I ain’t bringing nobody no problems and I ain’t taking on nobody else’s.”
I said, “good because you want someone that will be a blessing, not baggage!”
Ladies and Fellas, you don’t want problems, you want a partner.
A relationship should not be baggage and if it is, you need to leave’em where you found’em.
So what will you offer to the other person in your relationship?
Will it be baggage or blessing?
