I was talking with a friend and we were talking about our dating experiences. I shared with her how anytime I would meet a guy who was interested in me, I would always let it be known to him that I'm not moved my material things, whether that be physical things or physical attributes.
Reason being is some people will try to buy your love to manipulate and control you. Then some people act like they are God’s gift to the world and the last time I checked the bible says that God gave His only begotten Son Jesus Christ.
So Jesus was God’s gift to the world.
It’s nothing wrong with being confident and having self-esteem. You should esteem yourself. But there’s a difference between being confident and arrogant. The bible instructs us not to think more highly of ourselves. Some men and women expect you to latch on to them because of their looks and just settle for their shenanigans.
I’m sure you have experienced this too.
Some people think because they have good looks that everything is golden. Not so! For me, having good looks may catch my attention, but it will require more than that to keep my attention. So if all you have to bring to the table is good looks, good luck!
Ladies and Gents, you can not make an eternal decision just on physical attributes alone. I'm not saying it's not important.
Yes! There must be some physical attraction, but physical attraction can't be the main attraction.
You have to look beyond the surface. Cute is not cute if it's crazy. Handsome is not handsome if it's hateful and hurtful.
Especially being a believer because we have an enemy. The bible says he is a master masquerader. He will intentionally send people your way that look good but inwardly they are full of dead men's bones. That’s what Jesus told the scribes and pharisees in Matthew 23:27.
Don’t get me wrong, I like a guy who is clean cut, that smell good and is sharp...like don’t step on my shoes type of sharp. I like that kind of guy. However, I’m wise enough to know that a person can look clean cut and put together on the outside, but they are unclean on the inside. I also know that a relationship built on physical gratification will not last. Physical things change.
You want to love someone for the things that don’t change like their character and their convictions.
Even God looks beyond the surface. When God was ready to anoint a new king, He sent Samuel to Jesse’s house so he could interview his sons for the new position of kingship. Well Samuel saw the oldest son and thought he was the one based on what he saw on the outside. He saw how good he looked, he had a clean cut, he was smelling good, he had the fresh outfit on and he had some status and was popular. But God checked Samuel and told him to stop looking at his physical attributes. He said man looks at the outward appearance, but I look at the heart.
In other words, God was saying I need you to see how I see. I see beyond the surface. That’s a prophetic word for somebody.
See beyond the surface. See what’s going on in that person’s spirit.
What else is the person bringing to the table besides good looks? I will share with you one of my tactics...it's free, but the rest will cost you. One of things I look at when I'm getting to know someone is, how do they treat people that aren't necessary? Somebody that they don’t need. Of course they are gonna be nice to me because they wanna get with me.
If someone wants to impress you, they put on their best behavior trying to win you over so they will be nice all day. But, how do they treat the cashier? How do they treat the waiter? How do they treat the store clerk? How do they treat others in proximity while yall are hanging out?
That will tell you something about their attitude and morals.
Being nice to someone is a necessary component when you are trying to win someone's heart. But when a person is nice to someone who is not needed or necessary, it reveals that their niceness is their character no matter who they are dealing with. It also confirms that their niceness to you is not a facade.
If all you have to bring to the table is good looks, good luck with trying to build and sustain a healthy relationship. It's simply not enough. There’s a difference between something catching the eye and capturing the heart.
Good looks catches the eye, but intelligence captures the heart.
Don't just be a good looking container, put something in it.
Substance is needed for sustainability.
